It was my final CDS day after diligently or well maybe not as diligent of 12 months serving my country. The day started with one frustrating rain that gave no caution sign so my legs were swimming in my Jungle Boots by the time I got to the LGA. Whilst in the bus, I was a bit happy the rain fell, because this meant few people would come for CDS, few people meant shorter queues and all round, less frustration. I was shocked to go there and find the line even longer than usual. I even saw Corpers I hadn’t ever seen. That’s when I actually remembered it was final clearance.
It was going to be a long day, I thought. I wish I knew it would be not just a day but almost a year. Due to the queue and rain that drizzled on us, (Oh by the way, our NYSC anthem teaches us that we should be prepped for that) everyone was on the edge. If you ever want to jump a queue and die, try jumping a queue of tired and rain beaten corpers. Just try it! Someone will tell the story for you, because you won’t really make it. Anyways, my LGI ( Local Government Inspector) was just as pissed as the rest of the Corpers and it started to show in her voice and hisses.
At this point, I couldn’t care less. I just plugged in my earpiece to while away time as the queue crawled not knowing my life was about to change. So, Mr. Eazi’s “Hollup” was lined up next on my playlist but I wasn’t listening to it yet. I was still jamming to HarrySong – Raggae and Blues. The queue wasn’t moving any more and more cards were coming to be signed, and this made the LGI really angry, so she was going to step out and check what was causing the delay.
When my LGI rises, it is usually dramatic. Everyone knows she’s gifted behind , and it is really hard (IMPOSSIBLE) to ignore, so all the boys just went Ehhhhhhhhhh! Well done Ma! She also knew what she was capable of with what God had given to her.
She just frowned in a mix of disgust and pride, walked fast and somewhat angrily. My earpiece was plugged and my playlist was now on Mr Eazi’s Hollup, at the exact point where he said “You think say the world dey revolve around your bumbum” As she walked past me on the line, that’s what I said with my head down. The whole place went grave silent as she turned back, but I didn’t know. She turned back and said, who said that? I was deep into the song ooo, I went on to sing the next line which says “You think say the world dey revolve around your big *****?” I don’t really remember much after that but I know something landed on my face and my phone fell, I was so confused asking what happened. I tried to explain to her by showing her my phone’s playlist but it went off when it fell, so I looked like a liar mehn! Ladies and Gentlemen, today is four months since that day, and I am currently still in my uniform going for CDS. Stay there and be asking me if they gave me Extension. I am currently CLO! On top simple song. Such a pity!
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