Sewing Machine

The Chronicles of Some Naija Tailors

Okay, here’s the thing: Naija tailors MTN: 53156731400637893 are heroes of some sort- they make us look good at events and help us shine in pictures we post on the ‘gram. However, everyone has had at least one experience with a bad Nigerian tailor (unless you had a magical birth and your lucky stars are aligned).

Whether they made you attend that owambe wearing an old outfit in your wardrobe because they didn’t make your aso-ebi in time, or they almost gave you a heart attack because they weren’t picking your calls and weren’t at their shops on the night before your family’s party, some Nigerian tailors have put us through the worst experiences.

We’ve decided to line up some of their worst habits. Maybe they’ll see this and change oh. ♥️

Giving you a special version of ‘what you ordered vs. what you got’

Despite sending them the picture of the exact type of outfit you wanted, asking them multiple times if they could make it (and them saying ‘yes’ each time) and even begging them not to disappoint you, they still did rubbish.

Disappointing you even when you do all the right things

You send them your material two weeks ahead of the due date but you still have to chase them to finish making your outfit up till the day before the event you need to wear it to.

Poking Their Noses in Your Business

‘Aunty, is this dress not too short for church?’ ‘E be like say you don add weight oh. You no dey exercise?’ ‘You no get the shape for this dress oh’ ‘You sure say you wan show your shoulder?’. ‘ You’re going to another person’s wedding? When will I sew cloth for your own wedding na?’

Abeg sew the cloth I’m paying you for and leave me alone.

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Lying through their teeth

Some of them will lie and promise you heaven and earth only to disappoint you when the time comes. They’ll tell you that the cloth will be ready by Tuesday evening but you’ll be in their shop on Friday evening begging them to sew the trouser so you can wear it for an event the next day.

Ignoring your calls

You’ll call and call to get updates on your outfit and they won’t pick up. Call them with another number and they will.

Doing ‘oversabi’

Adding accessories you didn’t ask for. Making your sleeves puffier than you requested. Adding a zip to the front. Adding buttons to the hems. All things you never told them you wanted.

Sewing an outfit that doesn’t fit despite measuring you

They measured your bodice, waist and legs but somehow, they still managed to sew something that was two sizes smaller or three sizes larger. Na wa oh.

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